Basic rules for driving in the Carribean

[OlexM]

BASIC RULES FOR DRIVING IN THE CARIBBEAN.

1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real Caribbean driver never uses them.

2. Under no circumstance should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.

4. Never, ever come to a complete stop at a stop sign. No one expects it and it will result in you being rear-ended.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.

7. Never pass on the right when you can pass on the left. It's a good way to scare people for a laugh.

8. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as a suggestion and are apparently not enforceable in the Caribbean.

9. Just because you're in the right lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a Caribbean driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

10. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly. The Caribbean is the home of the high-speed 'dally', thanks to the water company, electric company, sewer company and the random guy with a spade, which put pot-holes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.

12. It is traditional in the Caribbean to honk your horn at cars that don't move the instant the light turns green.

13. Remember that the goal of every Caribbean driver is to get there first by whatever means necessary.

14. The horn is the most diverse and accurate way to comunicate with. Use it to say hi to a buddy, must also wave at the same time so no hands are on the weel. Tell someone to move, using "free hand" to signal movement, again, no hands on the weel. Ask a girl out, you can do this with one hand on the weel, but just remember the the one central digit response does not mean , "oh hey there handsome, why yes Id love to do dinner".

15. Seatbelts are purly there for the faint hearted and are optional.

16. After sunset, all drivers mush have at least 2.0 blood alcohol level. Otherwise they will be in the minority and a hazard to other drunk drivers.

17. The car gets much beter receptin for your phone so for the best network coverage, why not use it consistantly whils driving, hey if you have a spare hand why not try a text!?

Инджой

[magician]

Оль,
боянистка,
я года 3 взад это постил, текст 1-в-1 ...тока вместо карибея/карабина/карабинца/ был ирландеец

[OlexM]

Ну ёлкас, 3 года назад, имеет право на возрождение. А они тут и правда сигналят друг другу, останавливаются на перекрестке "поболтать" - туши свет. Мне екзамен сдавать через 10 дней. Вот думаю, надо с инструктором покататься или нет?

[magician]

Сообщение от OlexM

Мне екзамен сдавать через 10 дней. Вот думаю, надо с инструктором покататься или нет?

остановиться на перекрестке - перетереть погоду с соседями, забив на экзаменатора

[OlexM]

Сообщение от magician

остановиться на перекрестке - перетереть погоду с соседями, забив на экзаменатора

Гы-гы-гы. А экзаменатору на это время протянуть банку с ромовым пуншем. Шоб не скучал.